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Thursday, December 12, 2013

WEIGHT LOSS & THINGS

I'm below 290 for the first time in years!  OK, I know a lot of you are probably thinking...YOU"RE STILL FAT!  Well that is true.  I don't really ever see myself being totally thin & I guess it doesn't matter now as much as it used to when I was younger.  Being THINNER will be great no doubt....but when you're thin & old...well then you just have more wrinkles.  Besides I'm pretty sure I won't be wearing a two piece when I'm 60.  Hell I haven't worn a two piece since I was like 5!  Anyway, I'm proud of myself regardless.  I'm down 27 lbs from where I was last year at this time.  If I would have had more discipline, I would have been down a lot more by now.  But that's just not me.  Though I AM determined to be down to at least 245 before April comes around....maybe May.  That's when it's getting warmer & you see all the "beautiful people" wearing shorts.  Every March/April I think to myself..."if only I had started losing some weight in October/Novermber, I could be down at least 50 lbs right now."  So instead of waiting until then to think of that, I'm thinking of it now.  So then when I DO think about it then, maybe I WILL be down that much!LOL  OK...I know I'm a bit strange.  I prefer the term "funny." 

I have been cleaning & moving things so I can get the Christmas tree up & things decorated....hopefully be doing that tonight or tomorrow.  So lifting things that aren't exactly light doesn't do much for my pain level.  Some days, I feel totally good.  Not much pain at all.  But a couple of nights ago, I moved some things...and my neck & shoulders have been hurting/burning since.:(  I have been taking the meds that I was prescribed for the Fibromyalgia & also have been putting ice on it some....but it's still not great.  Then I have "period cramps" a lot of the time....painful ones...& what's even worse about that?  I haven't had my period since October 4th!  No, I'm not pregnant...that ship has sailed.  Most likely in perimenopause...which makes me even more cranky than usual.  They have been a bit sporadic the past year or so...but not sure I have gone this long without one.  Even if I didn't have my tubes tied, I wouldn't worry about pregnancy, because you actually have to being HAVING sex to get pregnant.  I'm lucky if I get anything once every 6 weeks or so.  I have just pretty much stopped asking.  The rejection gets old after awhile.  We also get along much better when I don't bring it up (yes I know).LOL   I really didn't think that I would have to give up sex just yet.  Thought I had maybe 10 years left at least.  But I love him & that's that. 

I still have a job.  Which is good.  Well good & bad at the moment.  Good...because I need the money, I'm thankful to have a job when a lot of people don't & it gets me out of the apartment for awhile.  Bad because I'm in pain sometimes & don't' feel like going to work & also because I don't have a vehicle of my own right now. 

I THINK I have everyone bought for that I needed to buy for.  There may be one or two things that I still need to get, but at least I'm not waiting until the last minute like I usually do.LOL  Proud of myself for that too.  Now to wrap everything...which I don't like doing at all.  I either get too much paper or not enough.  Just one of those things that I'm not great at.  Besides everyone just rips the paper off anyway, right?;)   I work Christmas Eve from 9:00am-5:00pm.  So guess that's not too bad.  We are closed on Christmas (the only day of the year that we are).  Jeff's mom is supposed to come stay with us Christmas Eve thru the day after Christmas.  She's a cool person & we get along.  I just feel inadequate or something around her.  She's only about 8 years older than me.  She's tiny & has a ton of energy.  I have never had that much energy now that I think about it.LOL  It will be nice having her here though.  Just not sure how all that is going to go yet.  I want to spend some time with my mom on both Christmas Eve & Christmas Day.  She doesn't have anyone now really.  Just my sisters & I.  She also has a few good friends, but not sure what they're planning.  One of them, Jan & her husband Mike, have mom over for dinner a lot now.  Which I think is a good thing.  She got yet some more bad news yesterday.  She has gotten Social Security for years.  Well when her & my step-dad got married in 2009, she reported it, filed all the papers with everyone like she was supposed to, etc.  She got this thing in the mail, so she called them.  They didn't put her down as being married until 2012!!  Which basically means, if they think they overpaid her, she will have to pay it all back!!  She's struggling enough as it is.  I swear....life seriously sucks sometimes!!  I get sooo annoyed.

Dominic had his band concert last night & did really well.:)  He plays the trumpet.  They get out of school next Thursday for Christmas break.  They will have to stay with Jeff some when I work.  Mom can't come get them & watch them all of the time.

OK guess that's enough for now.  Hope everyone is having a good week.:)

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