Yesterday wasn't a good day AT ALL. Very emotional. Dave and I talked on the phone some and I cried a lot. It's kinda like going thru the divorce all over again. I should have just cut all ties a long time ago. I was such a mess yesterday that I just felt that I couldn't do this all again and that maybe I should just quit life...but I have kids...I CAN'T and WON'T do that, but I can't say that the thought isn't there sometimes. I just have to keep going and hope for the best...though that's hard for me right now. I just don't see much to look forward to in the future. I wish I felt better. I just feel sick to my stomach (literally) and a bit panicky. Don't want to deal with this again.
I have also decided that I will stay away from guys for awhile (we will see how long THAT lasts). I'm just tired of dealing with them and their bullshit. I sent texts to some of them yesterday wishing them the best and all. A few of them texted back and asked what was going on. I just told them that I didn't hear from them that much anyway, so didn't see the point. They apologized and said they would be "better." It doesn't really matter to me at this point in time.
I didn't get the papers turned in yesterday, but will today, since this is the last day that I can.
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