.

.

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

RESULTS OF SLEEP STUDY & MORE...

Well I haven't gotten an "official" call from the doctor about the sleep study yet..but the guy who did the sleep study that I only had a "little bit of apnea" and that was around 5:00am. So not sure if I still have it or? Guess I will know more after the doctor calls. It wasn't too bad..just weird sleeping with all that stuff hooked up to me.

I'm out of Mirapex (RLS pills)..this is the first night without them..so not too bad at the moment..but I can't get any til Friday..so may be a bit worse by then.:(

Christmas was good.:) The boys got some nice things and were happy with what they got. I got a new jacket, a poster from Twilight...my niece gave it to me..and also a deck of cards that have the movie characters on them.LOL Some perfume, a Tigger jacket, a couple of necklaces. My son, Dominic (9) likes the Raiders and he got a few t-shirts with their logo on it, a flashlight with their name on it and a Raider watch. My ex took it pretty well considering he's a Bronco fan.:)

I have been out of the diet pills for about a week now (Fastin). I felt that they were really working. I wasn't thinking about food all of the time. They're like $30 and I just don't have the money right now. So will have to wait until the 3rd to get those and the rest of the Christmas pics and some stamps to send everything out. I have gained like 7 lbs.:( But started exercising again yesterday and watching the carbs. I refuse to gain all the weight back that I lost. So right now I'm 316..yuck. Can't do much except move forward and be more concious of what I'm eating, drink more water (A LOT more) and exercise. Even if it's only 30 minutes a day...at least it's something.

I wished Greg S. a Happy Birthday on the 24th and told him Merry Christmas. He texted back to say thank you. Told him that I missed talking to him and he said he missed talking to me too. But that's all over now.

Never did hear from Mark S. Didn't think I would.

Louie wants more than friendship..I don't. Is that horrible? I have just taken care of people all of my life and I'm taking care of my kids right now and they are my #1 priority. Louie is in a wheelchair and has some health issues and needs pretty much constant care. I just don't feel that I can handle that right now. I don't know if that makes me selfish or not. I haven't been over to see him since last week, because I don't know what to say. I definitely don't want to hurt him. He wants to hang out on New Year's Eve...but I have the boys this year.

Mike K. texts me some, but not on a regular basis and when he does and I answer..then I don't hear from him til the next day or whatever. He texted me tonight and asked if he could call me. That was a couple of hours ago and I was charging my phone, so I just got the message. I didn't text him back. Just don't feel like talking right now. When I have needed someone to talk to..he hasn't been there for me at all. People need to treat each other the way they want to be treated. I just tend to "shut down" with people who don't show that much interest in being in my life.

Paco wanted to know what I was doing on New Year's Eve too. I just don't feel like doing anything..just hanging out with my kids and watching the ball drop in New York is good with me this year.

I feel better now that the pressure of Christmas is past. I know that's weird and I don't know why I feel that way. Just time to move forward and it will be a new year soon and that's always a good thing...although 2012 might not end all that great..you never know. I prefer to believe that everything will be OK..that the "craziness" surrounding 12-21-2012 is just that.

I don't have any desire to go out with anyone right now or even to go out. I have crazy moods. Sometimes I WANT someone in my life and other times, I know that I don't have time for anyone right now. With everything going on with my kids, my feelings towards my ex, my weight loss issues, wanting to do what I want to do when I want to do it, etc...I just don't think I'm willing to put in the time it takes to develop a relationship right now. Which sucks. But it's just the way it is.

1 comment:

Tim said...

I totally know what you mean about not having the desire to form a relationship with anyone at the moment. I'm the same since my break up a few months back. I think it's time for me to focus on myself a bit and really work out what I want and how I can get what I want. Maybe that's the same for you too.

I'm pretty pleased Christmas is over now, I feel like I can get back into some sort of "normal" routine without all the stresses and temptations surrounding me. As much as Christmas can be fun and joyful, it brings a lot of hassle too! haha.

It sounds like you had a good one though!